Hellooooo

Hello! I attended a meditation retreat once, where we were asked to look into the eyes of a person whom we had not met before. How difficult it seemed to do! There is something intimate about looking at another's eyes; as it draws you in–to the other, and to yourself.

I feel that if we would look at each other more, it would be difficult to argue, fight, war.

Can you look at your own eyes in the mirror, Michael?

Not a single person met your eyes.  Wow….that is strange.  And do you know those days when everyone meets your eyes and the universe is dancing and leaping with all of those eyes meeting?

Sounds like the dance of contraction and expansion.  To know both sides of the equation….that Being intimately knows the looking towards as well as the looking away.  And can be fully in that place, maybe even eventually swelling in “love” for that apparent absence, as well as the apparent fullness.

I felt loneliness for awhile last night, as well.  Was sitting with it, until I detected a subtle “story” that was infusing it….and I was hardly even aware that the story was there….that there was a subtle pushing away of the “what is”.  When the story illuminated it, the pushing away stopped and the loneliness disappeared the way you blow out a flame.  

So interesting Michael. I've experienced that before, where no-one wanted to connect. I felt like I was the weird one for attempting after that. But as you said, the stories can dominate one's mind and there are a lot of people - probably most - whose first thought is … the next thought! They're not really in a state of recognising value in connecting. Indeed I go through this often. Thank God for GAIA, then I know I'm not totally nutters hahaha I also have other friends sme of whom unfortunately live abroad that are [intense] connectors as well. This to say, we are not alone in the literal nor the figurative sense, so don't let the story overwhelm at all. :)

A story: I made regular eye contact with a guy from Iran when I lived in Spain; he was fresh out of Tehran. I had no clue that this wasn't done in certain cultures - women making eye contact with men. The guy proceeded to conclude that I had given him an offer [as in, sexual offer] and ended up attempting to dominate my social and private life… ok, he ended up being what we would call a stalker hahah Since then I take 'eye contact' in some context. :D

I connect really well with the spirit, as I do on GAIA. Lead with the heart…

Love always to you all, sherri

You're handling it well. It almost drove me and others crazy! I guess that would be the more 'intense' of us… I seemed to have mellowed in time. You kind of wish you had a 'mind opener' to instantly open them up. But this is what the evolution of consciousness seems to be working on, on its own. A lot less blurs … and me feeling less like I am somehow different for being 'awake'. Changes are happening; I'm very intuned with nature and I can feel the difference in people. They'll wake up, just in time. :)

Thanks again for indulging me. sherri

I think nowadays a lot of people might feel intimidated by someone trying to make eye contact… because it is a somewhat intimate thing to do. I'm not a good in-the-eye-looker. Actually, I don't do it. In professional life I have to sometimes force myself to do it when talking to people (as it's considered rude not to, isn't it?) but when I manage to actually look my counterpart in the eye instead of at their mouth (that I normally would look at), I can't focus well any more. It's almost as though I can do only one thing - look into someone's eyes or listen to what they're saying.
It's something I have to work on. I've had friends and partners complain all my life that I never looked them in the eye while talking to them (or in 'romantic' situations).
I can, however, get totally lost in my own eyes. I'm almost obsessed with my eyes. One day I was sitting on a bus and I gazed out of the window and by coincidence caught a glimpse of the reflection of my eyes and I was electrified - it was like “wow - those eyes” and only then did I realize they were my very own. :))

It's sad though that no one reacted to your attempt at friendly contact, Michael, esp. over there in the States. In Germany, it's normal for people not to look at each other, not to smile and not to say 'hi how are you'. I find it so refreshing and nice that in the States usually people do have a few nice words or at least a 'hi' for a stranger they don't know.
I had to learn 'opening up'. I would always wander around with an angry frown on my face - often unintentional but lost in thoughts. It was living abroad that has taught me to pay attention to those around me and that smiling at people really doesn't hurt. :))

Sending you a warm smile but lowering my eye lids still…

Jenny, I was pretty traumatized when I visited Germany that everyone was silent and focussed in public. I am pretty raucous, and make no excuses of it. So I was like, what's up here? Nobody's talking! I think I embarrassed my host by continually making conversation on the train hahah It's funny how practices are different.

In the Tropics we are very vocal and friendly and I have to tell you, I like that. I try to bring it into the rest of the world where I can, because otherwise, I feel really, really cold.

sherri

Well, thanks for bringing some tropical friendliness to Germany then, Sherri! :))   It's true, we probably appear pretty cold to most visitors. I am lucky because people from the Rhineland (where I was born and raised and where I still live) are known to be very jovial and friendly, esp. in the Cologne area. So more often than not you'll find people here to be very talkative and open-hearted. I enjoy it very much. Would be interesting to know whether non-German visitors do see a difference to other cities/parts of Germany or not (they definitely would if they came to visit in the carnival season!). :))

Michael, I know both sides of the coin you describe. Here in New Jersey it's hit–or-miss to get someone to say hi to you (I have some better luck when I walk). But, when I go home to Virginia (small town, 3000 people), I wave to people I don't know, say hi to complete strangers  at the post office or the grocery store. It's always a shock to see that sort of friendiness when coming from a seemingly cold place. Maybe it's a rural/urban-suburban split here in the States. When I lived in Brussels, people where a little bit more friendly. Sharing a beer always breaks the ice.

hey there michael, I didn't read the comments yet. Just wanted to comment first. I had to answer a question today what do I think my purpose is. I don't know what it is but what you describe is part of it. Just to connect with people. What kind of inservice do you do? I work in the medical field and deal with patients all day. The most important thing to me beyond diagnosing or treating, which is important of course, is connecting with them. They are a person. I want to know them. I walked out of Brueggers Bagels to day and this older man was crossing the street and he gave me the biggest smile and he said Goodmorning. He made my day.

Awake = conscious = able to take responsibility for one's impact or actions as they relate to the world. Is that what you're thinking, Michael? This state vs. existing? That's the distinction I tried to make earlier about driving lots of us nuts and that you handle it fairly well. It just takes patience and to live your best as I'm sure you do. One never knows what signal will get thru ultimately…

Oh I just have to jump in here too! 

I spent most of day serving food to the poor and homeless in the San Francisco's Tenderloin district.  I come away from these experiences so jazzed I can hardly contain myself.  It isn't about the good nourishing food; it is all about the moments or seconds of focused respectful attention I can give to someone – sometimes perhaps the only human contact that someone has had or will have all day.  (People sleep huddled on the street.  most of the times we just step over go by continue on our way.) 

But here, here in the shelter, WOW.  It is so full of life, talking movement high-energy-in-the-kitchen, all the scullery guys at the other end of the room in recovery and beating out a rhythm to the cleaning of the trays, the volunteers talking and smiling, the staff alert and alive and lit.  Laughter!  The occasional scuffle.  The occasional dog-on-a-leash being petted underneath a table.  Someone's playing ragtime on the old piano by the men's room.

BUT, I think the absolute most important thing going on is eye contact.  I search the face of everyone I approach – here I can do this! here I am supposed to do this! I feel beyond gender – and hope that my glance will be returned.  Some wish to be left alone, towels are draped over their head; others pass by in silence intently watching the floor.  But most most return my glance, return my “hi”, say thanks or bless you and then I get to say, oh you are very welcome!  And then the smiles flow. And my heart soars.

It is as if the smiles flow, the contact increases, the sweetness runs from person to person.  Have I never been happier?

What is so important about making eye contact?  And why is it easier somehow with those who are broken, lyrics from Leonard Cohen come to mind, something about the light being able to flow in through the cracks. 

I don't fully understand all of this, but it feels like rhymes with underlies rises to maybe the most important thing there is.  Connecting with one another, in love and peace.  Something about giving and receiving, an endless eternal loop of joy.

Jeannie

Jeannie, I have to agree with you. One thing that we are hearing and seeing emerging again in the West is the remembrance than man is a social species and that we need to connect with one another to feel wholesomeness. Other forms of 'existence' operate but we deteriorate or at the very least live well below our potential, by neglecting our connections. I am so very much enjoying the evolution I am observing. Thanks for that awesome story, for certain! sherri

Oh such a lovely bunch you are to connect with NOW.
Blessings
LeAnn

Haha Beautiful Michael! 

It can be tricky,but very fun to gaze into eyes to stop thoughts in their tracks.

Thanks for the expansion in my heart where we meet in the middle.  :-)

I see you.

YAYYY! I didn't even think of it like that: that you had 'separated' yourself to see 'them' as 'others'. That's pretty darn interesting!

I guess it's like they say: whatever you see in somebody else, there's some of that in you… It kind of makes sense actually. I've actually had a similar experience and I know I can do a whole lot better than to see anybody as 'them'. I feel pretty badly with myself when I go to that place. :(

But I'm happy to see us all back together! Not that we'd ever left!

Thanks Michael.

Maybe I will join ya. I'll wave hi from over here :)

Hi Michael, we haven't met yet but I would like to sit on the beach and talk and drink beer and see eye to eye if you don't mind my company?
peace,
Samme

Look for me here, ok?

oh gosh… the peace. the sensation of energy… pure, clean energy.

This is where you feel connection to EVERYTHING. That wide expanse of water just says: “There are no limits; the possibilities are vast and endless!”

I am small, but HUGE in this connection…

oooh the beach… i'm always ready for the beach… the smell of salt… the freedom… the ecstasy of life

waitwait for me!!  Kin we bring the dogs too pleeeease, they are wild with ecstacy romping through the waves!   Anyway, if every atom in me was once a star, so to with every-one every-thing  –  the salty foam-spackled dogs, the loose line of pelicans skimming the breaks, the seal head just visible look there! see her? watching us and undoubtedly musing:  what a joyous bunch of looney tunes, dare I go join them too, see feel the magnificent energy rising and expanding from them.  Bliss!

What do I feel here, hmm….
I feel an almost painful feeling of extreme cold in my hand from the beer.  But it feels so good against the heat in my body.  I taste the salt on my lips and notice that they are wrinkled from the heavy salt in the air and water.  I go back to them to remind me of the full experience of where I am.  Then I lift the beautiful amber colored bottle to them and draw in cold bubbles that burn my throat, but again, the burn is sooo good.  The heat of the sand holds me.  I am secure and content and joyous.  The sand on my shoulders itch as it sticks to my sweaty skin.  I move to scratch it with my nose and I linger to be enveloped by the smell and taste on my skin.  I feel completely present.  I am with everyOne.  I am everyOne.

is it safe to say? i don't know… but i feel safe and at home here, wherever my mind and thoughts are, they are with my friends.

I absolutely couldn't agree more. Three guesses why I stay living in the Caribbean, a stone's throw from the ocean? I had made a decision to only seek truth, beauty and growth in my life and was led to this place where I am living. I know that any time I need full refreshment to look there, to walk there.

I am happy to tell you that I don't need to look outwards anymore for that peace; I've also grown to recognise it in any place. But I would recommend a visit to the ocean, even a vast expanse of trees or open land, away from BUILDINGS! to get that sense of what is truly real if you haven't done it recently. Many of my breakthroughs have come after just a short time out there.

Thank you so much Michael. Be blessed.